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End Of March, 2008

Wow.  It’s the last day of March, 2008.  It’s been almost two years now since my ex-wife told me she wanted a divorce and that she was leaving.  I guess that is one of the reasons I feel so down.  My ex-wife turned 43 just a few days ago.  I used to always give her a thoughtful card… writing in it how much I loved her and how happy I was to have met her… you know I don’t think she ever remembered my birthday even once?  Maybe one or two times… but for the most part she’d ask me in July sometime ‘Don’t you have a birthday coming up soon?’  and I’d just smile and say ‘Yeah, next June.’

Oh well.  I haven’t seen Faith or Jacob since the night before they left.  I missed Jacobs graduation from 8th grade.  I’ve wondered how he made out at Christian Brothers where he went to High School.  We decided that he was on the wrong path nearing the end of 8th grade with grades and behavior and thought the more disciplined environment at Christian Brothers would help.  He’s near the end of 10th grade by now.  I wonder how he made out?  I miss the time we used to spend together watching “My Name Is Earl” and “Everybody Hates Chris”.  He used to listen to a lot of my old rock CDs too… introducing him to Led Zepplin and The Stones.  We’d go to breakfast a lot too on Saturday mornings.. to the West Street Diner.  I used to like taking him there.  It gave us time to just ourselves.

Faith graduated High School and went off to college but I’m not really sure where.  I suspect she went to UT Knoxville which is where we had planned to send her anyway.  I hope she’s enjoying herself and having a good  experience out on her own.  She’ll be good at it.  She was very mature and I was so proud of her when she managed to fly to Oregon by herself.  I made sure she could reach me via cell phone at any time but she really did a superb job on her own.

She is a wonderful writer.  I always felt she’d end up being a writer somewhere… yet her uncle is a big shot at TBS in Atlanta so I can also see her as a television personality.  She’s beautiful and has a great personality.  Maybe I’ll see her on TV one day.

Anyway, enough moping.  You know my therapist has been on me for over a year to join some online dating service.  She says that once I meet someone else to care about I’ll stop having these silly feelings about missing the people who left me.

I know she’s right.  I think it’s probably time to start.  In the next month or so I’m going to sign up and see if I can’t meet someone new to care about and who cares about me.

OK!  Today is he start of the 2008 BASEBALL SEASON!!!  Go Phillies!

Also, in my previous entry (really written by my mom) she mentioned that my uncle Fred had cancer as well.  He was having some surgery on his bowel last weekend.  Well, she told me on Sunday that he died Saturday night.  I don’t know the particulars, but you know what?  This has been a REALLY shitty two years for me.

1. My wife leaves and takes the only family I’ve ever had away.
2. I find out my sister has lung cancer – stage IV.
3. Our divorce becomes final and my ex-wife has me return Eddie – the dog they left with me when they left and who had been with me 24 hours a day the entire last year – to them as part of the settlement.  I’ve not seen the pooch since.  BTW, here is a picture of Eddie with my nieces cat “Monkey” at Christmas in 2006.

4. My cousin Toni gets lung cancer.  They remove her lung and she seems to still be doing ok.
5. One of my Aunts finds out she has liver cancer.  I won’t give details for her privacy.
6. My dad finds out he has a tumor on his pancreas that may be cancer.
7. Two days after we find out about my dad, my sister “Babe” dies of cancer.
8. My uncle Fred goes in to have his gallbladder removed and they don’t do it because they find he is full of cancer.
9. My dad has surgery.  Seems successful.  We’ll see.  He has some minor complications going on right now, but it was still cancer.  We’ll see what the future course is once he is over this major surgery.
10. My uncle Fred goes in for some bowel surgery over the past weekend and dies Saturday night.

What next????  Sheesh.

The surgeon seems to think dad’s ‘leakage’ in his bowel or Pancreas will heal on its own so he doesn’t expect more surgery.  Mom says he’s feeling better.  They’re feeding him through some sort of mainline thing that goes right into an artery in his neck.  Mom didn’t want to tell dad that his brother had died until he was doing better, but she decided to tell him last night.  I haven’t spoken to her today so I’ll try to get ahold of her later.

Sorry for the negative post.  I think I’m just going to go home from work and watch the Phillies game which I TIVOed today.

One Comment

  1. Mom says:

    Just had time to check your site today. I know how bad you must be feeling…. I was thinking of Kirsten last week myself, when doing up my birthday cards. I am so sorry that the marriage didn’t work out for you two.

    This has been a really bad few years for us, but especially you, with all that has gone on. I feel sure that things will get better though and am looking forward to that day! In the meantime, hang in there honey!!

    Love Mom

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